Not in the mood for celebrating...

This year I turned 32. My birthday was good. I got taken out to dinner at one of my favorite restaurants by my darling hubby, it was what I asked for. I just wanted some time alone with him, talking and eating without having to feed this child, or keep that child entertained. It was a lovely dinner, and I thoroughly enjoyed my pumpkin ravioli, creme brulee and 2 glasses of Reisling. I also got treated to breakfast with my family, and was given a Pandora bracelet with many thoughtful charms from my parents, and my sis and Emma picked me out a really special Best friends charm(I love my girls!). It was a nice birthday, although I'm not really in the mood for celebrating.

Sure we will have cake, my boys bought me an ice cream one, I'll dig into later, but getting older just doesn't have the hype it did at 12, 18, or 29! It could be that I found out Thursday night that my aunt had a stroke, and realized I would need to get to the hospital that night to say goodbye. On Friday my Aunt Jo passed away, and I am really sad to lose her. I can't say we were super close, but I always enjoyed our conversations. Although I only saw her 4 or five times a year, she was always so kind and genuine. She was a fixture in my life, a woman who I admired, and she was truly good. Her loss is difficult, but I am glad she is now with my Uncle Pat. I can imagine him saying something shocking and her rolling her eyes and saying, "Oh my"(or something like that in Italian) in her animated way. Although I'll miss her, something about them being gone together feels right. I guess after 50 years of marriage you just never seem whole without the other person. I hope you two are dancing tonight in heaven. Aunt Jo I hope you are wearing your beautiful wedding dress, and Uncle Pat you are that handsome young man again with your thick dark hair like in the photograph I've seen and can't seem to forget.

Come to think of it, maybe I'm just not in the mood for celebrating a birthday, how could I, when what I should be celebrating was a life well lived and loved. So thankful you have each other again, but feeling a bit sad for our loss here. Dance one for me, and kiss each other for me, and someday in my time...I'll see you again.