Sometimes When You Expect the Worst, You Are Pleasantly Surprised!

My sister went to Disney for 10 days. Now don't get me wrong, I am thrilled that she got to go on a great vacation with her in-laws and that Jack got to see Disney World for the first time. The issue was...my sister has a dog. Not just any dog, a dog obsessed with balls named Doc. You see I have a dog, a dog named Lennie, a dog obsessed with Doc who is obsessed with balls. Oh did I mention I have an 18 month old named Zach who is also, ironically enough, obsessed with playing with balls. Do you see why I was hesitant to watch Doc for 3 days while my sister was away. I could just imagine the dogs barking at each other all day, and Zach trying to get into the mix. Needless to say the whole idea produced a lot of anxiety, but I wanted to be a team player and I wanted to help my sister out...so I reluctantly agreed to assist in the dog watching. I just couldn't bear the idea of him being kenneled... I am a softy like that.

So when Doc arrived on Wednesday night, I was ready for the worst. It turned out he and Lennie weren't that interested in each other...well mostly because poor Doc started throwing up. He was sick in my kitchen, sick on my bed, and finally sick on a towel. The poor thing was so upset I couldn't even get mad, but I thought...this is going to be a long 3 days, especially because I didn't get to sleep till 1 that morning, and we all know toddlers love the early wake up call.

By the next morning I was still concerned, Doc seemed in better spirits, obsessing a little about a cabinet in my kitchen that housed the only ball in the house I hadn't stowed in the basement in a garbage bag the day before. I do mean every ball...Zach lost his toys, Lennie lost some of his, and any miscellaneous golf balls of Wayne's also made their way into my secret stash. I distracted Doc long enough to remove the object of his affection and the ball crisis was averted. The rest of the day went so smoothly that I was feeling confident.

Needless to say Doc really was no bother. He is a very sweet dog, very tolerant of a young boy
"petting" him (Thanks Jack for training him on that) and generally a snuggler. Even though I thought Lennie would drive me nuts, he even impressed me by how well he settled in and left Doc alone.. On the third day, I rewarded both dogs with a bone, and they did very well sharing. The lesson learned is that sometimes, I just need to relax. It was great to be able to help my sister out, and I dare say that once I see what it's like to have 2 babies and a dog, I might be willing to take on a few days of dog sitting in the future if she needed it. I guess sometimes its nice to step up and realize that you can do things you thought you couldn't. I am super glad I was able to help my family out and work past my anxiety. (Side note:Anxiety is common in women who are 7 months pregnant and dramatic by nature!)

Anyways here are a few shots of our days with Doc. And the anticipated return of Lisa, Mike and Jack, and the goodies they brought from Disney!

Lunch time... it's every dog for himself. Notice how nicely Doc is sitting, unlike my Lennie!
Playing together so nice!

Zach and Doc say their goodbyes!
Jack comes bearing gifts!
The Baby Yetti is a big hit!
And of course, Aunt Lisa spoils both her nephews with some matching shirts. Ah Li, do you remember those days? I certainly do...! I am certain Zach and Matt will look just as cute!
Thank you for all the great gifts, and we are so glad you are back safe and sound! Since I am passing out thank yous, a special one goes out to my Dad who spent 5 hours last night working on electrical in Matt's room, to my hubby Wayne for helping and staying awake, and to my cousin Johnny who saved the day! (Thank God, Uncle Cheech taught his son some of what he knows, since he is still in the hospital recovering, otherwise I am sure he would have made the 10 p.m. house call himself!) Oh, and thanks Mom for enduring my 3 hour picture and video show that I forced upon you!

A bittersweet 18 months!

I took Zach to the doctor's today and I was reminded about how quick my little boy is growing up. He got his last round of shots till he's four, and I have a sneaky suspision that the next 2 1/2 years will fly by faster than these last 18 months!

My little man is almost 30 pounds now...I mean seriously that is over fours times what he weighed at birth and he's grown 14 inches in that time period. I think the thing that amazes me most about him is his vigor for everything....no one should get that excited over crinkly paper, and farmhouse murals. Zach was seriously all boy today when he was racing around the room, so much so that the doctor suggested I put him in activity classes. I mean this boy needs to go go go! Trust me he gets that from his father, I am perfectly content to just sleep sleep sleep!

All kidding aside, I am feeling a bit bittersweet on the toddler stage. On the one hand I embrace Zach learning to interact and effect the world around him, whether its through his constant repetition of words, his astonishing dance moves, or his sometimes daring acrobatic skills. On the other hand, as I watch him grow I can't help but miss that baby that would let me snuggle him and rock him for hours. Now I get plenty of snuggles, but they come in 2 minute intervals. With the impending arrival of Matt, I try to remind myself that I will have the opportunity again to carry around my son without my back hurting after 5 minutes, and while I can't wait to go through those baby days with Matt, I have to recognize I will never see them again with Zach. I guess there is always something so bittersweet in the passage of time.

Just today, my neighbor said as his daughters were driving him crazy..."I don't want to wish away my life, but right now I wish I was 55!" Oh how many times do we think that? And yet each of us when we get there will probably wish back the very days that we are wishing away now. Again...a bittersweetness. I guess no matter where we are at on the parenting spectrum, as we watch our children grow, we look to their future, revel in their past, and hope that on any given day they feel we are fully present in their life. (Or maybe that is just our wish, that we remember to be fully present in that moment... because like the last 18 months, each one has gone by way too fast.)

A Preview!

I am happy to report that the walls are painted in Matt's room. Now all we have left is to get the moldings painted, the closet reorganized, the furniture put in, and all the finishing touches. Ok...the to-do list is slightly longer than I would like, but progress is definitely being made. We hit a snag today when the crib lady told us that it would take 6-8 more weeks for one piece of the furniture to come in, and well I freaked. I know I am not due until the end of November, but I want the room complete with plenty of time to spare. I also don't want to be 9 months pregnant hanging shelving, or trying to find curtains. We compromised and got a different color set, a bit darker, but the delivery and set up will be free. I can live with that...it will definitely make the boys' rooms very different. Since it will take a bit longer to get the full picture of Matt's room I thought I'd share a preview of his walls.

I took this image tonight in a poorly lit room, but it gives you a little bit of an idea of what's to come. The colors are so vibrant... I love them, and they look way better in the daytime. I think the stripe turned out great, and the three colors highlight colors in his bedding- I can't wait to see how it all comes together.

Team Renovation!

This past weekend has been a whirlwind of trying to get things in order for Matt's arrival and our life after he comes. When Wayne got a promotion 3 years ago it became necessary to have a work space for him in our house, so he used the spare bedroom as his office. With Matt coming Wayne has been detaching from his office so he's spent the last six months in the kitchen on his laptop. I swear I constantly have stacks of papers on my counters, my kitchen table, and my hub(my dining room table). It was getting a little out of control, and even Wayne had to concede that he wouldn't be able to take business calls with Zach running around and a newborn crying. With that said, the dilema began, what do we do for an office.

Wayne has been pretty adamant that he didn't want to go into the basement, even though we refinished the space in February...he wanted to have a place of his own. Well, I am so proud that my hubby was mature enough to realize that he could make the basement work, and I think he rather likes his new space. He finally got a corner desk, so he can spread out a bit, and hopefully we will figure out a filing solution. I got access to a computer in a play area, since I am w/o a laptop, so I think it is win/win. It should all work out fine as long as Wayne continues to get cell reception and the kids and I don't come down to play while he's at work. Here are a few pics of the basement playroom/office.

I think this space will actually work out better than the armoire type computer desk we had upstairs. Unfortunately, now we have a computer desk in the garage, but I am sure we'll think of something. Pictures of Matt's room should be coming in the next few weeks, Wayne's been working on painting his room this weekend too!

Well I better get going...we have a big Fantasy Football Draft party tomorrow and I need to tidy up the house.

The County Fair!

This past week has been a little hectic. It seems like every week is getting more and more busy as we gear up for back to school and baby #2. One of my favorite end of the year activities is heading to the County Fair, and this year I got to go again. It was a sweltering 88 degree day, and when you are 7 months pregnant, hot weather is not your friend, but I enjoyed myself. My Mom went with us and we all enjoyed the great food! To be honest, I think we would all go back just to eat if only we didn't have to pay $10 to get in.


Zach was super flushed in most of the pics, but don't worry it always happens to him in the heat. (It's just one more way that Zach carries Wayne's genes...they both overheat quickly!) This trip we didn't really walk the fair, mostly because I was tired and so was Zach, but we did play my favorite game, I GOT IT! and my Mom won! She let Z pick out a prize and he got a super cute Lion stuffed animal that is now in his room. Zach must have some of me in him too though, because he adored the game. He stood on my lap for 20 minutes just throwing balls. He was so happy there that he actually threw a full fledged tantrum when we made him leave. Later my Mom treated Zach to the game where he got to pick ducks and win a prize. It took him a minute or two, but he got into it after awhile. There he won a Looney Tunes big inflatable squeaky hammer, that I don't think Lennie is too fond of. (I am not sure if he dislikes the fact that Z chases him with it, or that its a toy that squeaks that he's not allowed to bit!) Here are some pics of us enjoying our time playing the games:



I know Zach doesn't look as thrilled to be playing the game here,but that was because he had just thrown his ball and he was concentrating on where it had gone...Dad was interrupting his game time and he was not so happy about that!The highlight of the trip to the fair was probably his time at the petting zoo. Before we headed over there, Daddy took Zach for a pony ride. Even though Zach wasn't smiling during the ride, I think he enjoyed himself. I don't think he wanted to show his dimples and dispel the illusion that he was a real 100% cowboy.

When we finally got to see the animals in the petting zoo, Zach was super excited...he practically tried to crawl through the gate:

Well...until the animals came over...then he ran:

Daddy even showed him how to feed the animals(mostly goat and sheep) and at first Zach was hesitant, but he got into it after a minute.

At the end of the evening we all had a great time. Zach enjoyed his trip to the fair, and took the time to pose with Grandma on the way out. Well...almost posing...he was a bit more interested in the plethora of people passing by.

All in all it was a wonderful day to spend at the fair!

A Photo Shoot!

My sister and I took the boys to get their pictures taken the other day. Zach was due for his 18 month pics and Jack just turned 3, so we thought it was a good idea to take them together. We figured this way we could get a picture of them together too, which turned out wasn't as easy as we thought.

Let me just say I can't believe the photographer got any pictures of Zach that he is actually in focus...the boy was like the Tasmanian devil, whirling around the studio. Jack on the other hand did really well listening to directions and posing for the camera. My usually adorable son on the other hand played with every prop for 2 seconds and then started running down the hallway. I was so exhausted from chasing him around that I finally conceded to end the photo shoot.

Fortunately the photographer was able to capture some gems during the day. Here are some pictures of the boys:

Zach and Jack:

Jack posing like a big boy:

Zach:

Aren't they adorable? I think so.

My Little Tumbler!

Yesterday my sister-in-law Lisa called to invite Zach and I to meet up with her and Jason at a kids' play gymnasium. It is something I have been hoping to take Zach to for awhile, so I was psyched that they had an open gym day. Lisa told me to let my sis Lisa know too, so today Zach, Jack, my sister, my mom and I all went to check out this awesome place and play with my other wonderful nephew Jason.

It was so wonderful to see how excited the boys were. Jason had some big kid friends with him, but he took the time to help his little cousin down the slide a few times. Lisa (my sis-in-law) also helped me out a ton, climbing into the bounce house to help Zach go down the slide, mostly because I am preggo and really not up to it. I wish she could have seen how excited he was when he was hanging with his Aunt! In fact, I wish you all could see how much fun the guys were having, but someone (who will remain nameless) forgot to charge the battery on her camera, so no pictures. SO SORRY!

Zach was a wild man, he was running everywhere, and especially loved running on a long trampoline area, back and forth. I did not so much enjoy trying to keep up with him, and making sure he didn't face-plant off this mat, but he was so thrilled. Boys are just made to run. Jason was everywhere, considering he is an old pro at the place, and Jack was so entertained by this giant foam filled tank, all the kids could jump into.

It was a wonderful day with my nephews and my boy, and even though I was exhausted at the end of the hour, even with the help I got, I can't wait to take Z back there. The only downfall...trying to get the kids to leave. Both Zach and Jack were exhausted and threw fits as we pried them off the mats. I'm not sure about Lisa and Jack, but I know Z and I came home and took a good long nap!

Thanks Lisa and Jason for the invite! We can't wait to come to your birthday party there in October! Next time I am bringing Wayne though, as I am sure all the running after Z will only be more exhausting at 9 months pregnant!

One finished project down...thirty more to go!

I am happy to report that Wayne and I did make some headway this weekend on Matt's room. I filed many months of bills and sorted through papers in an attempt to clear out his space. Wayne and I have set a painting day aside for next weekend, so we have a lot to do before then. I figure if we can get the room painted before the furniture arrives at the end of the month, I will be able to put the finishing touches on while I am working. I guess at this point, I will have to.

The one project I am most pleased with thus far in my preparations for Matthew is his needle pointed name. I think it turned out pretty well considering I had to alter some of the pattern to fit it on the fabric, and Great Grandma Helen had to help by sewing an extra piece of fabric on to have it framed. Wayne and I were a little surprised at how the frame turned out, mostly because we don't remember it looking like it does, but I think it will work in the room. I haven't quite figured out where the picture will go, but I figure I have some time before then.

So without further ado, here is my masterpiece for Matt:

Tomorrow I am taking Zach to get his 18 month pictures taken, so hopefully I will have some cute proofs for my post tomorrow. We will have to see how it works out since they aren't until 12:30. I think tomorrow might be a day for 2 naps...one in the morning and one post photo shoot! I also have a doctor's appt in the am. I am sure all will go well, although I'll be interested to hear what they have to say about my little hospitalization episode.

An Encounter, A dinner date and a b-day!

Since I have once again lost track of my posts this week I did want to share some stories from our weekend at the lake.


Did I ever tell you that my mother hates mice? I mean she is terrified of the little creatures. Truthfully I think she has her Mother to blame for this fear since my grandmother, who was an extremely strong individual would leap onto a chair at the mere thought of a mouse, screeching. (Or so my Mom says.) So last Friday when Wayne, Z and I arrived we discovered something a bit shocking at the lake house. Mouse droppings. There were not many of them, but they were definitely there, and we quickly cleaned them up. Neither of us wanted my Mom to know that her sanctuary away from home had been defiled by the mice, for the first time in years. By the time she arrived, there were no signs left of the little critters.


To avoid an epidemic, I told my Dad about the droppings, and he spread some poison around the cottage. We all continued on until my mother started raving about how wonderful a job my Dad had done protecting the cottage from mice attacks in the recent years. I couldn't help it I started laughing. She immediately knew I was covering something so I tried to come up with a cover story...aka a lie, and instead ended up laughing at the things I was saying hysterically. Things like, "I did not see a mouse in the house." had me in tears, so my brother finally took me out of my misery and told my Mom the truth. She was a bit upset, but she was coping.


When we went to bed, Wayne and I choose to sleep in the main room, mostly because I hate sleeping in the same room as Z. I always wake up when he moves and he wakes up when we move...it is a bad combination. About 2 minutes after the lights went out, as Wayne was watching inning 14 of the Yankees/Red Sox's game, we saw movement overhead. Wayne turned to me and said, "What is that?" I looked up in horror. He continued, "It's a bat!" I stared in horror. Now I am not a wimp when it comes to wildlife, I've had my encounters, but I was seriously freaked about a bat flying a foot over my head. Wayne turned to me and said, "Your mother must never hear of this." and I responded with, "What are you going to do?" He said, "Smother it." Now I should explain that my Mom and Dad were in a room just feet away, my Dad was asleep, but my mother was still awake. All that separated us were French doors. I was not about to argue with Wayne's logic, but I was pretty concerned that he was going to get hurt somehow, I was also worried my dog would get bitten, so I grabbed Lennie and cowered at the end of the bed/futon. At first Wayne told me to open the sliding glass door, so we could chase the bat out, but after minutes of the futile chase, we realized it wasn't going to work. At one point we thought he'd got it out, so we turned on the light, but as soon as we turned them off again it started its freakish flight above us. I think this is when Wayne decided smother the bat he must. I watched for a few minutes as Wayne batted a blanket at the black creature disrupting our slumber, and felt my adrenaline start to course through me. The bat was making an eerie swooshing sound and a low cry, and it was then I decided I couldn't watch and took Lennie into the back bedroom where Zach lay sleeping. I only stayed in there for minutes, because I couldn't bear to leave Wayne alone to defend our cottage, so I closed the door and hovered watching the scene play out from the hallway.


Here is what I saw: After a few minutes of lifting a blanket in the air, Wayne pulled the quilt to the floor. He looked up and said, "I got it!" I wasn't sure what he was going to do with it, and to be honest I don't think he really knew at that moment. He later told me he could feel it start to move towards his leg, and so he did the unthinkable. He began to punch the blanket in an attempt to bludgeon the bat (Did I ever mention my husband was a Marine) and after a few moments I could see him turn to my Mom's room and say " Do not look in here, keep your eyes on the computer screen. Do not look in here, turn away." It wasn't until later that he realized she thought he had a mouse under there. A lot seemed to happen at once, it what can only be described in retrospect as one of the most humorous scenes I've witnessed. Wayne was pummeling the blanket, telling my Mom to look away, while my mother was yelling at my father, "Louie, wake up Wayne has something under the blanket!". My Dad groggily rousing his head to look at Wayne's fist flailing in the air punching the ground, and my Mom crying because she was so upset. At this point Wayne said, "Oh, my God, I think I got it!" and said, "Turn on the light!" I did only to discover that the bat was not under the blanket, stuck to the blanket or after a extensive hour long search conducted by my father and Wayne, in the cottage at all. At least not where we could find it. We were all frazzled, my father thought Wayne and I had hallucinated the bat, and my mother was shaken, but slightly relieved that it was a bat and not a mouse. In fact in the course of our search we discovered that the "mouse droppings" we had encountered were in fact bat droppings, which made us all feel slightly relieved. As we drifted to sleep, safely locked in the back bedroom with Z, Wayne told me, the bat was dead. He knew he had hit it, and that if it wasn't dead yet it would be soon. He assured me it was not in the cottage...so I slept, sort of.

The next night it was just my Mom and I and Z. We had a lovely dinner out at the Red Lobster. Both my Mom and I were anxious about what the evening would bring, but we tried to act like big girls. Here is a pic of Z and my Mom enjoying themselves before we headed back to the "Batcave"

Even though we were all smiles at dinner. That night as Z slept like only a baby can in troubled times, my mom and I sat in the main room watching a movie with every light in the cottage blazing. We were so on edge we actually took a wind catcher hitting the sliding glass door, to be the bat trying to get back into the house. We managed to make it through the evening and then headed off to bed, without seeing a single sign of the vanished bat.

On Sunday we celebrated my father's birthday as we all lamented what could have happened to the mysterious bat. Some claimed, it had never existed, others like myself thought it must have escaped like Houdini through the passage it had come in through, while Wayne asserted that wherever it was, it was very much dead/ injured. I must admit, I didn't like to think of it as injured especially because the whole time it was under the blanket it let out these awful shrieks. I even prayed for its soul that night...I know I am weird. The festivities went on. We opened presents. Dad got a Kindle from my mom and Wayne and I (Z and Matt too),and some great gifts from my sis and bro. We enjoyed a Coldstone Creamery Ice cream cake and a lot of laughs. Here are some pics from the day:

My Mom, Jack, My Dad, and Z by the lake
The boys bringing Papa his gifts
My Mom and My Dad- Note: The mess in the background is not our cottage. The neighbor was installing a new window.
The boys "helping" Papa blow out his candles.

My Dad making another wish: I hope it comes true Dad!

Shortly after all of the celebrations were over, the cake eaten and the gifts unwrapped, it was time to head home. I couldn't find Lennie's leash, so my Mom tried to help. What she found instead was a bat...flat as a pancake, beneath a rug in the main room. I couldn't bring myself to take a picture, even for the sake of the blog, but I am happy to report the mystery is solved. As for the bat's many brothers and sisters who were also living in the eaves of the cottage, they have been successfully blocked from entering. I can honestly say that the Batcave is officially closed, and I think I speak for all of us, that we are happy to have the cottage back to ourselves!

A bit of a scare!

I had every intention of writing about our encounter at the lake yesterday, but I was side-tracked by a bit of a scare. My sister and I ran to the mall to pick up a gift for our cousin's b-day, and while there I had what I would later find out was a vasovagal attack.

Apparently when you have a vasovagal attack, you feel dizzy, nauseous and break out into sweats. I had all of these things, but luckily did not pass out. I was scared, Zach was scared and my sister was scared. After this feeling subsided I felt crampy so I called my doctor who I was expecting would tell me to come over. Instead they sent me to the hospital, which was super frightening. I was pretty freaked out, but my sis took Z, and Wayne came and got me.

The whole ride there I felt guilty about how at first I wasn't as grateful as I should have been about Matt being a boy, and how if anything happened to him I would never forgive myself. I just wanted the little peanut to be ok, and after 2 hours on a fetal monitor, them measuring to see if I was having contractions, and the most painful exam I've endured, I found out that we were both just fine. What a relief. I really feel so blessed to have both of my little men, and I will never forget how frightening it was to feel so helpless. I must say it was a relief to see Matt again, and to hear he is doing just fine. As anxious as I am to meet my baby boy, I am sooo glad that I wasn't in preterm-labor, and that I get to enjoy his movements from the inside, just a bit longer.

The beginning of a much overdue recap- The Zoo!

Last Friday I took Zach to the zoo for the 2nd time ever. We haven't been back since last summer when Z was only six months old. I was worried he'd get bored, or not be that interested, but boy was I wrong. It might have helped that we went with five little boys and one super cute little girl, and he seemed just as entertained by the big boys running around as he was by the bears in their exhibits. In fact the only real battle was trying to get Z to stay in his stroller some of the time!

Our first stop at the zoo was the elephants, and I didn't think I was going to be able to pry Zach away from the bars. Just look at how enthralled the boys are as they take in the elephants:

Just look how my little man is edging his way in next to his cousin....ah he is getting so big! Aunt Lisa was kind enough to lift him up to see the elephants, and even though we tried to take a few shots, getting Zach's attention was tough, because all he wanted to do was see the animals:

After the older kids ran off, Zach stayed behind to admire the elephants. He kept turning around and squealing in delight, and then racing back to the bars to see one of Mommy's favorites at the zoo....obviously he gets his love of elephants from me!

Zach and I even got to see an elephant playing with a water hole, he was splashing himself with the water. It was really sweet how kid-like and playful elephants can be, but it also made me a little sad that such a magnificent creature was in a zoo:

After visiting with the elephants we headed over to watch otters swim and some of the kids took in a sea lion show. Zach tried to get into it, but he was squirming all over in the hot sun, so we left early and headed over to the carousel. He did so well holding on to the big horse (I stood right next to him), but it sort of made me sad that in a year, or so, he'll want to go on alone. We were able to see some bears:

Rode a train with his Aunt Penny (AKA by best friend Jen)

Went to the rain forest exhibit where we saw a waterfall, monkeys, and a fascinating fish...the piranha

Then well the bigger kids who know not to eat sand, played in a giant sandbox, I took Z to see my another of my favorite animals...the giraffe! (I really wanted to get my Mom a picture of the giraffes too, because she just loves them!) So did Zach who did his stare...

Then run in excitement routine for them too:

We ended the day with some lunch and some Mommy and me pics:

Lisa and Jack:

Zach and I enjoying some milkshakes:

Even Lisa and I were able to take a sister shot...

It was a beautiful day at the zoo, and I can't wait to bring the boys again next year. I especially liked the part where Zach and Jack fell instantly asleep when we got in the car and started out for home.

Stay tuned as my recap continues of an eventful weekend at the lake( We have an encounter, a dinner date, and a birthday still to catch up on!)

Spaghetti....Oh!

I decided to make some spaghetti and meatballs for dinner the other night, and I usually give Zach some ziti, or penne, but I was out. So this was his 1st experience with the spaghetti and it was priceless. I mean just look at how funny he is trying to figure out exactly what to do with it:

He did seem to get that he should try to use his fork...unfortunately he didn't aim for the spaghetti at first anyways. Then he was able to pull it together...well sort of:

But he quickly regressed to using his hands:

And while it wasn't the tidiest of meals....he had an absolute ball having it!

I'd say I had a happy customer on my hands...well a few actually:

I just love this picture. It reminds me of the movie "Lady and The Tramp"....except I'd rename the film "Lennie and the Scamp". After a nice dinner the boys relaxed by watching some "Phineas and Ferb" while they digested. Isn't this picture too cute? I guess zoning out to the tube is just one more thing these two have in common. As if their eye color, hair color, nose, chin cleft, and dimple weren't enough! (Can you tell I am a bit jealous Z doesn't look a tad more like me?) I guess the best part of what they have in common, for me anyways, is that I am lucky enough to call them both mine. (Now lets hope Matt decides to look just a bit more like Mommy :) !)